Rip’s Domain

Today is my birthday and my co-workers decided to take me out to lunch (they’re such a thoughtful bunch). On top of that, our graphics intern made me the funniest birthday card I’ve ever seen. I asked her if it would be OK to scan it and throw it up on the web for others to enjoy and she said I could.

So here it is, the first goatse birthday card! Just click on the image, print, cut and then fold. Give it to someone you love.

Today is my brother and I’s birthday!!!! We’re celebrating 32 years on this rock. Hopefully I’ll still be blogging in another 32 (I doubt it).

Anywho, Happy Birthday bro!!!!

Well my Mom has made it to the big 57!!! I can’t believe she made it this far with offspring like me and my brother. I love you Mom!!!!

Last week my Peach passed away. I still miss her deeply. Now we only have her ignorant daughter, Jewly, to remind us of her. Don’t get me wrong, Jewly is one cute animal, but she doesn’t hold a candle to her mother, however she does take some pretty pictures.

I know it’s Friday and I’m suppose to be happy that the weekend is coming up and that I get to share my BASH findings with all of you. However today is a just heartbreaking. My little Peach had to be put down today. She was 15 years old.

Peach was my english cocker spaniel that I literally help deliver with my mother. Obviously as you guess that held a special place in my heart.

Over the years she has given us numerous liters and some really lovable offspring. One of our other pets named Jewly  is her daughter.

I really don’t know what to write other than that I will miss her deeply. Rest in peace my little girl. Now you can play with all the plastic ducks you want.

Peach
May 1, 1992 - November  16, 2007

I think someone put a curse on me.

Here is what has transpired over the last 5 days:

Monday: It’s my 2nd year anniversary. I take the day off to be with my wife and have a fun filled day of just being with her and doing couples stuff (if you know what I mean). That all goes to hell as termites start to invade my condo again, in my kitchen all places that I spent $30,000 dollars remodeling. Needless to say all anniversary plans for the day were off as I flipped out and tried to make appointments to get the the termite guys out there sometime this week. I finally am able to get an appointment with Terminix for Thursday for them to come out and treat the place.

Thursday: Termites guys are coming out around noon. I wake at 8:00 am since I’m suppose to meet the maintainence guy so he can take off the roof vents around the outside of my unit so the termite guys can spray in that area. Needless to say the bastard never shows, so around 9:30 am I have no choice but to do it myself. I spend the next hour and a half taking these friggin things off while trying not to damage any portion of the over-hang. After taking the vents off I have to race to home depot to get replacement vents since I had no choice but to damage them as they were so old I couldn’t get them off without doing so.

Termite guys come over and start spraying the place. During the course of the treatment, they manage to spray the spice plants my wife has been diligently growing for the past month. Of course this means that I now have to throw them out and beyond that, you know my wife is going to be pissed. Also in the mist of all that is going on, I get sprayed in the face (not good and which was my own fault) with the termite chemical and race to the sink to wash the crap off.

Once Terminix leaves, I spend the next 2 hours trying to get the replacement vents to fit into the existing holes; which I had to bang and “sculpt” into place. All things considered, I think I did a pretty decent job.

After taking a shower and cleaning up, I go to check all the email I’ve missed during the day and Comcast has decided to go down and remain down until 8:00 pm.

At 9:30 pm, wife comes home. I spend a couple of hours with her and then decide to turn. Lucky me… tonight is one of her more active nights where she talks in her sleep and decides to use me as a punching and kicking bag. I finally get to bed around 5 am this morning when she wears herself out.

Friday: I’m not feeling at all good. My stomach is killing me and I can only think it was from the chemical being sprayed in my face yesterday. Along with a stomach ache comes other things that I won’t mention. To try to calm down my stomach, I have a pumpernickel bagel. While eating the bagel, I bite down on a rye seed (how that got in there is anyone’s guess) and crack my back molar.

So now I have a dentist appointment at 3:00 pm to get my tooth repaired. If you don’t hear from me in a couple of days, it’s because I got into a car accident on the way to the dentist and died. With the way this week is going, I wouldn’t put it pass the forces of nature.

UPDATE: We’ll I lived. So as I’m driving to the dentist, I-95 is all the way backed up to Ft.Lauderdale and I have to go to Boca Raton. Seems that a fucking plane crashed landed on I-95 south bound and the north bound onlooker traffic was backed up to FT. Lauderdale. Can you believe that?!?!? A fucking plane.

As a result, I was 45 minutes late for my appointment, so I have to go back on Monday to get the work done.

That’s it, I’m getting going out and getting drunk. See ya all Monday!

I’ve been married 2 years today!!!

I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since my wedding. Damn time flies!!! Who ever said marriage isn’t hard better get their head out of their ass. Believe me it’s tough, I’m not the easiest person to be married to and I have to commend my wife for putting up with me this long. Hopefully she’ll be around for a long time.

Anywho, the real reason for this post is this: my wife got me an XBOX 360 Elite, Guitar Hero 2 and DDR Universe as an anniversary present!!!! Is she not awesome or what! Needless to say that blog posts will be non-existent while I cure my Guitar Hero and DDR addiction finally.

<sappiness>Now for the reason for this post…. I love you Linny!!! Thank you for being my wife and best friend. </sappiness>

My brother and his wife made a Windows Movie collage for my mother for Mother’s Day a while back and use the song 100 years as the background music. Since watching that video, I feel in love with this song. Hopefully you enjoy it as much as I do.

This one is for the wife. Love ya Linda!!!!

And just so you all don’t think I’m turn gay… KORN baby!!!!!!!!!

This Slashdot post has put an end to a (going on) 32 year argument between my brother and I… I’m smarter!

Sorry Charles, not only did you not get the looks, you didn’t get the brains as well. You poor, ugly, stupid bastard I still love ya though…. BTW, Kara sucks.

Well it’s all over…. my brother is now a married man and is enjoying the wonders of marriage. Good luck to them both (she’s going to need it). We’re all tired from the festivities this weekend. I need to go to sleep.